The Marriage Termination Clause
by becauseimsunny
Summary: Amy is given a piece (a very big one) of Sheldon's thoughts on divorce before they are even married. Howard is also given a piece (a very distorted one) of Bernadette's thoughts on divorce after years of being married to him. Shamy being cute, girl talk with Penny's posse, Howardette on the rocks (?), the gang being supportive. Pairing: Shamy Howardette


The Marriage Termination Clause

 **Amy is given a piece (a very big one) of Sheldon's thoughts on divorce before they are even married. Howard is also given a piece (a very distorted one) of Bernadette's thoughts on divorce after years of being married to him.**

 **+Shamy being cute, girl talk with Penny's posse, Howardette on the rocks (?), the gang being supportive**

 **And I own NOTHING. Credits to characters, original story and everything about the Big Bang Theory belong to Chuck Lorre, Bill Prady and their team.**

She can't believe it. When she had told Penny that she would marry Dr. Sheldon Lee Cooper in exactly four years, she did not expect it to actually happen. However, in exactly four years since she had said those words, and only three months from that moment, Amy Farrah Fowler is getting married to the man she loves. He is a real man and he has arms!

Goodness, three months. That's a lot of work. But whatever, she is the bride. The pressure is on the maid-of-honor, Bernadette.

"As much as I would love for you to be my maid-of-honor since we are besties," Amy had told her bestie in one of their girl's nights, "assigning you to that coveted role would create a social imbalance."

Penny, after nearly ten years of living with four weird guys and being married to one, had already learned not to be confused with anything that comes out of the mouth of someone as weird as those men. "Why?" she had responded.

"Well, for one, I was maid-of-honor to Bernadette's wedding while you decided to spend what was supposed to be the happiest moment of your life, apart from becoming my friend, in a place where I couldn't even catch the bouquet."

"Right," Penny could only nod.

"And I would not want you to overshadow my bridal beauty. You know, how gorgeous you are."

"Right," Amy's bestie had nodded again, this time with a big smile plastered on her perfect face.

"Awww, that's so sweet, Amy," Bernadette had cooed.

Amy had almost forgotten about her. Poor, little thing. So to let Bernadette know she was not completely left out, Amy quickly responded with "Bernadette, on the other hand, would not provide me the pressure of looking good."

The grimace on Bernadette's face that followed had only conclusively proven her statement.

It was really hard for her to do that to her best friend but what could she do? As much as she would want everything to go her way, there are some things that should be followed according to the ever baffling social convention.

 _Knock, knock, knock._ "Amy."

 _Knock, knock, knock._ "Amy."

 _Knock, knock, knock._ "Amy."

The familiar obsessive-compulsive knock of her fiancé brought Amy back to the present. She opened the door and there stood the man of her dreams who is going to father her children, if she's lucky to even get him to the part of making them.

"Hi Sheldon," Amy said as she welcomed him into her apartment. She can't believe he still doesn't consent to them living together.

"I must say, Amy, you're looking very pleasant today. Does being engaged to a man who is about to win a Nobel agree with you?" Sheldon asked and sat on his favorite spot on her couch.

She almost swooned. Her boyfriend is so romantic.

"Yes," Amy agreed as she sat beside him. "Being your fiancée does trigger the happy notch in my brain, boosting my estrogen, decreasing the pore size on my skin and giving it a smooth, pinkish surface. FYI, it also ripens my eggs, ready for copulation," she finished with a wink.

"My dear, Amy," Sheldon shook his head, "you know I am not quite amenable to the term fiancé. That's what you get for hanging out with Penny too much. You get too absorbed with her nonsense."

Amy felt a bit hurt at him not agreeable to being her 'fiancé' but she tried to hide it. After becoming his friend-who-is-a-girl-but-not-his-girlfriend, then becoming his official girlfriend, breaking up with him, and then getting back, she had learned that Dr. Sheldon Cooper's mind is sometimes just too amazing for her to comprehend. He might have just easily meant it some other way.

"If you don't you like being my fiancé, then why did you propose to me?"

Sheldon looked at Amy with disbelief on his face. "You really need to spend less time with Penny and, I hate to say this, more time with me."

And, then she's back to being happy.

"You're being uncomprehending," he added.

And down again. Being his not-a-fiancée sure is like riding a roller coaster.

"Well, why don't you want to be my fiancé?" Amy cried.

"Amy, I proposed to you not because I want to be your fiancé," Sheldon explained. "I want to be your husband."

And up again. See what it means?

"Oh Sheldon, that's so romantic."

"Really Amy? Romance? Is that all you think about?"

"Fine," she conceded. "But what difference does it make? You're a man who is engaged to be married to me. Per definition, you are my fiancé."

"What difference, she says," Sheldon mumbled loudly. "There _is_ no difference, that is the point. A fiancé is nothing different from a girlfriend or a boyfriend. Per our relationship agreement, you are my girlfriend and I am your boyfriend. Tell me, are you still bound to perform your duties as my girlfriend and I as your boyfriend?"

"Yes." she pouted.

"So is being a fiancé. Are we still in a relationship that is in a commitment binding us to exclusively date each other, otherwise you befall into a socially offensive act that is called cheating?"

"Yes." This is going nowhere.

"So is being a fiancé. But, are we in a relationship that where, in the event that one party, quote-unquote, cheats, the other is given the right by the US government laws to charge the cheater with a legally punishable offense?"

"No." Oh wait, it is. It's going his way.

"And are we legally bound to consummate our relationship and doing otherwise might render it null and void?"

Amy paused to think about it. This might be going somewhere. How ironic that coitus has actually crossed his mind.

"Amy?" Sheldon condescendingly raised an eyebrow.

"Yes," she gambled.

"Tut! See? Penny's brain is rubbing off on yours," Sheldon complained. "But since I'm being considerate here, I'm going to ask you again. Are we legally bound to consummate our relationship and doing otherwise might render it null and void?"

"No," she groaned.

"So is being a fiancé. So you see why I am not amenable to the word. The change of term renders no change in substance. And frankly, if we do change the definition of our relationship with each other, we'll have to revise our entire relationship agreement. Don't get me wrong, it's easy to revise it since I saved a soft copy of the draft. I'll only have to find the words 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' and replace them with 'fiancé' while all the rest remains," he said rolling his eyes. "However, in a matter of three months, we are going to enter into another contract. Changing our current agreement would prove futile since effective relationships, as is generally accepted, and demonstrated by C3PO and R2D2, should be long-term."

Amy could only smile. "So when you drafted our relationship agreement, you thought of us lasting long?"

"Of course. Unlike you, I have never thought of ending it."

Him saying it so matter-of-factly, so confident, so sure, and without a glint of sarcasm in his eyes just confirmed to Amy that Sheldon Cooper is the perfect guy for her.

"That brings me to my intent in coming here," he changed the topic. He took out from his sling bag a thick, bound document and carefully placed it on his lap. "This is a draft of our prenuptial agreement as most marriages have the option to enter into."

Sheldon carefully handed the document to his girlfriend as if it was a prophecy from the Hall of Mysteries. He looked at her and savored the heightened feeling the amazed expression on Amy's face is giving him.

"You chose to ignore my video calls and told me you were busy doing 'something', and that 'something' is this?" she asked, or rather, complained.

Sheldon bit his lip. When he met Amy, he thought he finally understood social convention and how humans are supposed to interact with their partners. However, when she broke up with him, he found out there are so many things he still does not understand especially about women, though he would never admit it aloud. You never know what would tick them off. And he doesn't want to go through that break-up again. It was horrible, more horrible than Leonard Nimoy's death.

 _When in doubt, stick to the truth,_ a pigment of his brain told him.

"Yes?" he answered hesitantly.

"Sheldon!" Amy tackled him with a hug.

Sheldon flinched. He guessed he would have to get used to it since they are going to get married. That sudden jolt his cardiovascular muscle makes as if it's going to jump out his chest, the sudden warm sensation on his face that makes him want to stretch his lips into a convex line, and the shortness in his respiratory function when he thinks about the proximity of Amy's body parts are going to be part of his day-to-day life in three months.

To ease some of his suffering, he rested his chin on Amy's head for a moment and arched his arm around her shoulders and patted her twice before parting from her.

 _Hoo boy,_ a quarter of his brain sighed.

"All right, let's not ruin this moment." And by ruin, he means him having a panic attack. He wouldn't say it aloud, though. "You can run through the agreement while I set up my notary."

"Wait, wait, wait," Amy stopped his arm.

He looked at her, then to hand on his arm. _Hoo boy,_ the quarter of his brain reacted to the touch. _Get used to it,_ another quarter reminded him.

"What is it now?" says the quarter of his brain who is talking to Amy. _Women, you're never gonna know what's going on in the brains of these creatures,_ says another quarter who is talking to the other two quarters of his brain.

"As you know, the science of continuous improvement used by successful businesses teaches us to learn from experience, eliminate non-value-adding activities and improve value-adding ones," she answered. "Over the years of being bound in a relationship agreement with you, my experiences have constantly told me that I should have retained a lawyer. It's like listening to an annoying little know-it-all repeating 'I told you so' in my head."

Despite all of Amy Farrah Fowler's setbacks such us not being a fan of comic books or Star Trek, her mind is truly an admirable aspect of her.

"Of course," he nodded. "You need time to read through this. After all, you are going to share my favorite honorific in the future."

"You're right!" Amy beamed at the realization. What a wonderful sight for Sheldon. Not only does she look prettier when she smiles, her admiration for him becomes even more apparent. "If I'm going to take your family name, we're going to be known as Dr. and Dr. Cooper."

"And look, we have resolved our longstanding issue on my pet name for you. I still don't understand why you find pet names to be important or the fact that you don't like to be endeared as Gollum, but I believe you have no reason to dislike the family name of a great man such as myself. But it will have to wait until three months otherwise that honorific is going to be an inaccurate title. You're okay with that, right?"

"Of course! That is so romantic!" Amy, then proceeded to cup Sheldon's cheeks and planted a quick kiss on his lips.

 _Hoo boy,_ said that quarter of his brain again.

"It's all just romance to you, isn't it?" he mused, shaking his head.

Amy ignored his comment and wrapped her arms around him in a boa constrictor hug that has become all too familiar with Sheldon. Even if Amy claims that they have not gone to second base, this is the seventeenth time those 'second bases' have touched his elbow.

The quarter of his brain hooted again. _Hoo boy._

* * *

In the bedroom of Mrs. Hofstadter, Penny and her posse were trying on new clothes they bought earlier that day.

"Amy, what are you reading?" Bernadette asked Amy, who was now reading a curious material.

Bernie had never seen Amy so immersed in a book that she didn't even notice Penny strip her blouse to try on the things they bought that day. When they fitted clothes, Amy would always watch Penny and admire that gorgeous figure while secretly cussing her own. But since both Bernadette and Penny had gotten used to Amy's quirk, what she's doing now is admittedly weird even if it's less creepy.

"Yeah, Amy," Penny, who was now wearing a leopard-printed tank top, joined in. "What is that? You've been reading that thing since this morning. You didn't even get to try some of those floral grandma dresses you always liked."

Amy looked up with a wide grin and a face that could only mean her Sheldon-face, the one when Sheldon does something 'romantic'.

"This is the most romantic thing I have ever read," beamed Amy.

Bernadette was right. "Well, what is it?" she probed, now even more curious.

"Is that one of those fan fictions you write about you and Sheldon?" added Penny.

"Better," their recently engaged friend answered. "Yes, it's about me and Sheldon but it's not fiction. Plus, he wrote this himself."

Penny, who could no longer take the suspense, took the book from Amy's hands, opened it and read the title page. "Oh. My. God!"

"What is it?" Bernie grabbed the book and read the title herself. "The Prenuptial Agreement of Sheldon Lee Cooper and Amy Farrah Fowler."

Penny took the book again and began reading the subtext. "The content of this agreement enumerates, iterates and codifies the rights and responsibilities of Sheldon Lee Cooper, hereinafter known as the Prospective Husband, and Amy Farrah Fowler, hereinafter known as the Prospective Wife."

"It just makes you gush, right?" Amy giggled when Penny finished.

Mrs. Hofstadter had to smile at that. "You know, romantic books usually begin with once upon a time, but this works, too, if you are married to nerd doctors."

"I know," Bernie agreed. "Mine and Howie's prenup was so horrible we decided to keep it under the large chest of forgotten things that used to be the chair his mom always sat on so that none of us would ever want to go near it again. But you guys managed to make this cute and romantic."

Bernadette pointed at the fifth section under the table of contents for Penny to see. "Look here. They even have a provision for Wedding Vow Renewals. Isn't it sweet?"

"Sure," Penny smiled and nodded. "That's exactly what I meant when I said romantic."

"Yes, it is," Amy weighed in. "On our twenty-fifth anniversary, we are planning to hold what we envision would be Princess Leia and Han Solo's wedding. I wanted to do classic Romeo and Juliet. But he got me when he said he doesn't want me to see him dying. The last thing he would look at before he died would be the horror on my face and he wouldn't want it."

"I wouldn't want it," Penny remarked sarcastically.

"In addition, Sheldon thought it would be a good follow-up on our first wedding since we'll be reenacting Anakin Skywalker and Padmé Admidala's."

"It's so nice when their weirdness just trumps normal guys' romantic gestures," Bernie mused. "The sweetest thing Howie wrote for me was the song about Uranium isotopes you guys sang on our anniversary."

"Yeah," Penny chuckled. "I totally got that. You're almost inseparable, it's sickeningly sweet."

"I know. _Almost._ But like uranium isotopes, we can get divorced, too."

Penny and Amy slowly turned to each other as Bernie watch their mouths morph into wide O's.

"Hey, you're not actually taking what I said literally, are you?"

"Oh no," they both denied. Bernadette did not see the look on their faces when their mouths morphed into O's again, this time accompanied with mischief in their eyes.

* * *

It was Saturday night and everybody was at 4B making Shamy wedding preparations.

Sheldon who had just finished his laundry came in and sat on his spot beside Amy. "Why aren't you singing the happy working song? We've already proven its effect on efficiency when we helped Penny with her Penny Blossoms."

"Sweetie," Penny called, "just shut up and pick up the scissors."

"I can't believe you guys are helping out," Bernadette complained to the men who were cutting out Death Star-shaped wedding invitations. "When Howard and I were getting married, none of you wanted to help. You let us girls do all the work."

She then placed the tray of chocolate cupcakes on the center table.

"You didn't want them in Klingon," Howard answered and picked up a cupcake.

"And we're not just helping with the invitations," Leonard added. "We're also going to create heart-shaped light sabers as giveaways and put them in ancient looking chest-boxes."

"That one was my idea," Raj said proudly. "When you are a wedding organizer for two parties with polar opposite interests, you have to be creative in getting those interests together and still have one controlling overall theme. Sheldon's interests are inclined toward the pop culture while Amy is into medieval literature. After watching a few episodes of My Fair Wedding, I found out women are mostly just concerned about their wedding gowns. So I figured why not base their wedding from one of Sheldon's favorite movies of all time? Sheldon gets his pop-culture reenactment and Amy gets a Medieval-styled wedding gown."

"Wait," Penny interjected. "Weren't those two secretly married? I mean, I've seen that movie many times with you guys so I know the only witnesses were golden Sheldon and his short blue-and-white girlfriend."

"I know," Amy said dejected. "When Sheldon said he wanted to do a Star Wars inspired wedding, he first thought we were going as C3PO and R2D2."

Sheldon looked at Amy in disbelief. He would've now admired the ensemble on her head composed of her bright green eyes, her nose that's perfect for the idiomatic expression 'looking down on one's nose', and lips that just naturally taste like brownies, if he didn't know of the occasional nonsense that crossed her amazingly impressive brain. "I still don't understand your aversion for R2D2, but I suppose I could compromise a little bit. With my baby face, I could pass off as a decent young Darth Vader."

"There's my sexy toddler," Amy's green eyes lit up with glee.

"So what are the invitations for if you wanted to reenact a wedding without any guests?" Penny asked, bringing the conversation back to the original subject.

"That's the best part of it," Sheldon, who loves to listen to his voice, began to explain. "There wouldn't be any social pressure on guests to dress up in chic, elegant, suffocating material because it'll be like you're going to a movie, or a Comic Con event, or a poorly executed on-stage reenactment like the musicals they hold in Japan. So guests will be like an audience the way they're supposed to be, be themselves the way they want to be, and wear anything they want even if it exposes them to peer judgment and social condemnation."

"Wow Sheldon." It was Berndatte's turn. "You're being really more considerate with the whole wedding than Howard was."

"If you were less cranky about the Klingon then I would've been more considerate," Howard mumbled with chocolate cake in his mouth.

"Yeah, but Sheldon's not being pushy with the Klingon."

"Oh, of course," Sheldon sang. "We're recreating something from Star Wars, not Star Trek."

"And that's why you should have chosen _absolutely_ inseparable isotopes," Penny sneered at Howard. "Otherwise, Bernadette's gonna think about separating the _almost_ inseparable."

"Penny, I told you I didn't mean it that way when I said divorce."

There was a collective gasp from the group.

Howard had finally given his full attention to Bernadette. "You talked about divorce?"

Then, Sheldon at his attempt to console his friend whispered softly to Howard. "You should let Bernadette spend less time with Penny like I told Amy to. She's the one who convinced Amy to break-up with me."

Everyone turned to leer at Penny.

"Sheldon, why are you being mean?" she pouted, not knowing how to defend herself.

"I'm sorry," Sheldon waved apologetically. "The evil of young Darth Vader is rubbing off on me."

* * *

"Thanks for seeing me to my apartment Dr. Cooper," Amy said as she entered her apartment.

"My pleasure future Dr. Cooper," Sheldon smiled which Amy immediately shared. Sheldon's grin, saying she's future Dr. Cooper is just immaculate. It was so much better than being future Mrs. Christopher Grey she had fantasized when she was sixteen. "Besides," he continued, "if I'm not gonna do it, you might break up with me again."

Awwww.

"Sheldon, if you don't want to do it, you don't have to."

"Oh this is like seeing Penny's play all over again. I really can't get the 'want to but have to' things right."

"What I'm saying is I'm not breaking up with you even if you won't see me to my door," Amy comforted Sheldon as she patted his cheek. "I want you to be comfortable being yourself."

"Great!" Sheldon bent down and kissed her on the lips. "Can I go home now?"

Amy could've fainted. After telling Sheldon to be himself, kissing her on the lips wasn't first on the list that came to mind.

"You can, but now that you're here, there's something I want to discuss with you."

"Hm," Sheldon pondered. "It wasn't a question, so I can't really say no." He stepped inside and sat down on Amy's couch. "What it is that you wanted to talk to me about?"

"I want to talk about our prenup."

"It's about time." Sheldon felt excited. He couldn't wait to watch the look of veneration on the face of Amy Farrah Fowler, future Amy Farrah Cooper, at the brilliance of the acclaimed genius that is himself. Oh goody! Oh goody! Oh goody!

"I want to say, after reading all the seventy-three pages, this agreement is surprisingly less restrictive than our current relationship agreement," was Amy's observation. Just looking at those bright green eyes, piercing his soul through his visual cortex is a delight Sheldon would like to enjoy for the next fifty or so years of his life.

"I don't know what to say," Sheldon admitted, "but I'll take it as a compliment, since statistically ninety percent of what you say is in reverence to me."

"Yes, it's very detailed and clearly defined to avoid confusion to neither party. I would say you took an extra mile to make sure I don't misunderstand anything. And I appreciate it, thank you."

"I have no idea what you are talking about since the details laid out were meant to amaze your receptive brain, but I'm glad for however it meant to you," Sheldon as ever replied sweetly with a Koala-looking face. It's Koala-looking because it's not his Koala face. He's not pretending. His heart is really melting at this conversation with Amy Farrah Fowler, future Amy Farrah Cooper.

"There is one specific thing you failed to fill in the details about," Amy pointed, which shocked Sheldon.

He gripped his chest when he felt a sudden stab of pain after hearing what Amy just said.

"I don't want to believe you, but go on."

"I want to hear your very specific thoughts on divorce-"

Sheldon gasped in horror. "What on Earth has gotten into you? Did Penny broach the subject? Well, if she did, I would like to assure you it's not about us. It's about Howard and Bernadette." He paused to think and gasped again as he realized something. "Did you ask her for advice about divorcing me like you did before I was able to propose and you broke up with me? Are you thinking of doing it even before we are married?"

"Of course not," Amy quickly assured him. "And it's not that I want it to happen. It's just that you are usually very careful on planning out your future. You consider all possible outcomes, including alien invasion. You even included possible causes of our deaths, which some of those, by the way, are both tragic and touching. I'm just surprised you did not include divorce, that's all."

"Because divorce is not a possibility!"

Amy could not say a word. He is like a Hobbit, albeit tall and less hairy. After years of being with him and understanding his ways, he still manages to surprise.

Sheldon is angry at the thought of divorce. In her love-struck state, Amy could only look at him with more love than ever.

Sheldon's eyes widened as another realization hit the four quarters of his brain. "Do you want to put a marriage termination clause because you think of it as a possibility?"

If history is going to tell, Amy always thought Sheldon would be the one to break up with her but it ironically turned the other way around. She was going to yes, it is a very far-fetched, very remote possibility. The little quiver in Sheldon's lips as he waited for her answer changed all that.

"I don't think it's going to be a possibility for us," Amy finally said.

Sheldon breathed a sigh of relief.

"But just out of curiosity, I want to know why you don't have a provision of it in our prenup," Amy probed. She had been afraid to ask, but now that she knew how Sheldon thought about having a future that could last until the end, her inhibitions disappeared.

The sincerity in Sheldon's blue eyes as he looked at her was as clear as a warm morning sky. "I might have not told you before, but I'm always making sure I can commit to every relationship I enter into. I always tell Leonard before I start watching a new TV series that if I'm in, I'm in for the whole ride even if the quality declines."

Classic Sheldon. She used to hate how he values TV and their relationship equally. But realizing how, in his past, his relationship might have just been with TV characters instead of real people, Amy had also learned that his relationship with her are as important as the TV shows he loves. And that's saying something.

"Sheldon, we are not talking about a TV series here that could just end after ten or fifteen years. We're talking about our marriage that could last for the rest of our lives."

"Well, first of all, Doctor Who series started even before I was born and it's still there. Second, this marriage could only last until one of us dies, unless we die together of course. But I see your point."

"So? It still doesn't change anything?"

"No." This time it was Sheldon who reassured her. "As I have said, if I'm in, I'm in for the whole ride even if the quality declines."

She did not know how it was possible for her to able to love Sheldon Cooper even more with each passing day. It just is.

"Well, I promise you it won't," Amy said, reaching out for his hand.

"AT&T promised the same thing but after only thirty days when you've fully-committed with the network, their coverage plummets like a bomb drop in Nagasaki."

"Well, I'll try not to be like AT&T."

"Thank you," Sheldon sincerely replied. "It means a lot."

Amy moved closer to Sheldon and wrapped her arms around him.

 _Hoo boy!_

This infernal struggle, Sheldon secretly complained.

"What are you doing, Amy?"

"Nothing. I'm just letting my boyfriend know I love him."

He wanted to grip his chest because his heart is doing 'it' again but he can't. Amy's head is resting on it.

"You know, there are so many ways a person can let another know one's feelings of love. For example, I love you, too."

Amy looked up at him, their faces now so close he could almost feel her lips. "Or you can just wrap your arms around me."

"Oh so we're cuddling now?" Sheldon gulped. "What about our prenuptial agreement?"

"Do you want me to kiss you, too?"

I would if my heart's not busy enough as it is, he complained internally.

"Alright, we're cuddling," he gave up and wrapped his arms around future Dr. Cooper just like she said, as she rested her head back on his chest. "Just cuddling."

Nobody said a word after that.

This is one of the moments Sheldon liked best, when the two of them are just sitting quietly inside one room, listening to how each other really sounded like without a care in the world. Their record of not speaking to each other was six hours. It was heaven. He could hear Amy Farrah Fowler's dandruff fall on her shoulders, her slow steady breathing that once in a while lets out a wheeze, and the sound of her heartbeat in sync with his.

"Amy?" Sheldon nudged her after a short while.

"Yes, Dr. Cooper."

"Don't ever leave me again."

Amy looked up, once again caught off-guard by Sheldon's sudden sweetness. "I won't."

"Not ever?" he said, looking a little bit scared.

"Not ever."

"Good. But I suppose I can let you leave me when you're going to die. Death is an inevitable future for all of us mortals," he contemplated. "But if I'm able to invent a machine that could let us transfer our thoughts to a microprocessor, thus, allowing us to technically live forever, I can't let you leave me, okay?"

Amy was close to tears. So, to stop herself from crying, she kissed Sheldon on the lips. "Okay."

"Hey!" Sheldon's eyebrows furrowed. "I thought we were just cuddling?"

"Are you gonna punish me?" Amy winked.

"You know I should."

"Hoo boy!" hooted Amy, echoing the exact same thing a quarter of Sheldon's brain was saying.

* * *

Meanwhile, at the Wolowitz residence, Howard could not stop thinking about how Bernadette had talked to Penny about divorce.

"Howie, we were just talking about the romantic things you guys have done for us girls," Bernadette explained. "I told them the best one for me was the song about Uranium isotopes."

"Yeah, and I suppose that was your favorite because there's a loophole in it that says you can divorce me since we're only almost inseparable."

It breaks Bernadette's heart to see his usually carefree and confident husband look so sad and insecure. "No, I was focusing on the inseparable. Penny was the one who made a big deal out of the almost."

Sorry, Penny. Someone has to take the blame.

"All right," he sighed. "Are you sure the song was the best and not the lock and keyhole act I did for you?"

And there's that glint of mischief again. Her Howie is back.

"It was the song. But I can tell you a secret about how almost inseparable your key and my keyhole are?"

"Let's unlock the secret to your keyhole with my key, my love."

Howard stood up and picked up Bernadette in a lover's carry, only to fail miserably when he heard a tiny cracking sound from his waist.

"Ow, ow, ow."

Bernadette bit her lip to stop herself from looking too entertained at her husband's failure.

"Let's not break your keys, honey."

"Yup. I got that secret unlocked, sadly."

They walked to the bedroom, with Bernie assisting her limping Howie by the waist.

* * *

It was nearly an hour since Amy and Sheldon had started cuddling and although Sheldon would like to keep the silence, he just had to break it.

"I'm starting to rethink this whole wedding thing."

Amy, startled, broke from their embrace and cast a concerned look at Sheldon. "Are you having cold feet?"

"No, my feet are perfectly fine."

"Sheldon!"

"What? I was talking about the wedding. "

"So was I."

"No, you were talking about feet."

Amy frowned, unsure of what they are talking about now. "Well, what is it then?"

"I'm worried that if we recreate the wedding scene of Luke and Leia's parents, we might share their fate."

"Oh Sheldon, are you worried that I'm going to die after childbirth?"

"No. As I have said, death is inevitable. I'm worried about my legs getting cut-off. They're one of my greatest assets," Sheldon beamed proudly.

 _That's all of it. I just had to console myself after being taken into a roller coaster ride of joy and sadness from ep 9x07, fast forwarding into the future I'd like to see. Don't judge me fans. I'm a wreck (it's chuck lorre's fault) and probably don't know what I had just done._


End file.
